You know youre a bad friend if...

Throughout my clubbing "career" I have made many observations. The biggest ones come down to girls and their friends. Especially the nesters. There is always one friend in the group who you have to just shake your head at. Sometimes, its the whole group of friends that you shake your head at. These girls need not go out anymore. Actually, they need to because they just make my night better.
For that one girl in the group I always look at her friends and wonder why they do not stop said girl from acting like shes never been anywhere before. If this is you, than you are a bad friend.
You know you are a bad friend if:

-Youre at a club, its 11pm , your one friend is rockin out, jumpin on tables, partying like its 4am...and you just sit there watching her. Tell that b*tch to sit down and hold off for another hour or so.
-Your friend is intoxicated and talking to a dude who resembles Fonz Worth Bentley on crack, Napolean Dynamite or Rick Ross...and you just sit there and watch her.
-Your friend is puking in the bathroom, banging against walls, trippin over people...and you just sit there wondering where the hell she is for two seconds then go back to doing your two-step.
-Your friend walks out of the house with muffin top, spandex in places spandex should not be allowed or sandals with her toes looking like theyre trying to commit suicide off of the shoe...and you say "ohh girl you look cute" you know dam well she does not

While this does prove highly entertaining for the rest of us, its really just not nice. Then again, maybe you shouldnt try to help her because then who will I make fun of?..ah the decisions in life.

Ms.Movie Phone gives it.....

A thumbs up and a thumbs down. Everyone's been talking about this movie so I went to see it and was eh about it. There where about 2 scenes that where super disturbing and one that made me, yes me, cry. Other than that I thought it kinda dragged on and was a bit too long. Def a wait for it to come on Demand-er.

But if you dont want to listen to me, then go see it. And I love to say I told you so, so hit me up on BBM after youve seen it.

You can not come soon enough (exclamation points to the upteenth power)

One of my favorite songs of all time..dont judge me

Whenever this song comes on my Ipod I get flashbacks of when music was better, in my opinion. Fox, Case..comeback!

One mystery of life

Why, whenever this song comes on, do girls at a club or bar go crazy?

Idk how she does it

I was cursed with the shyness gene. Alot of you that dont know me too well may say to yourself "you? shy? yeah okay" Im not shy about cracking on people, making jokes, talking to strangers, etc. Buuut when it comes to matters of the opposite sex Helloo shy girl.
One of my friends, who seriously needs Jesus in her life and maybe an exorcism, but we love her, has absolutely no qualms about going up and talking to dudes. Mainly for others, but still lol. Last Friday we where out, I said out loud "Oh that dude is cuuuute" she says "ill be right back" and there she came with the dude and his homeboy. I had OH>EM>MOther>EFfin>GEE written all over my face (those who witnessed the first Erika going to say something to a dude event know what this face looks like..sheer terror and if I was white youd prob see some shades of red). But whatever, it was done.

Point of all this is that I really need to start taking lessons on how not to give a eff. Life is short and we aint gettin any younger. And if you have a little kindergarten crush on someone, just let em know. Or just ask Erika to do it for you. Shes on Facebook.

"Where do you find these people?"

I have not shared the news with all, but I got a new job. I am currently working in the HR department for Ricky's. Not my dream job, but its on my list of things I dont mind doing, mainly because during this season I get to make fun of people. All.Day.Long. I really dont know where these people come from and how they survive in life. Im not exactly splitting atoms either, but I have a brain enough to pass judment on these people. You would too.
You see their geniusness especially when they are filling out paper work and calling the office. Here are some examples of the Einsteinness Vanessa and me encounter all day long.
On the phone:
Boy:" Hi, can I speak to Vanessa?"
Me:"Sure where are you calling from?"
Boy: Pause..Pause..Pause.."My cellphone?"

Boy:" Hi how can I apply for a job?"
Me:" Go into a store and fill out an application"
Boy:" But the stores closed!"
Me:"So go when its open"
Boy:" Oh, Okay"
Okay, I couldve been a bit nicer.

Me:"Hi thank you for calling RICKYS this is Melissa speaking"
Girl:" Hi is this Party City?"

When filling out paper work here are things we have seen..I can not make these things up:

Status (Here any normal person would put Single or Married): Dating, boyfriend, girlfriend, single :(. unmarried, never married, ?, x

Emergency contact (Here any normal person would put who you want us to call God-Forbid something happened and what that person is to you): 911, relationship:"good", relationship: "baby daddy", relationship :none

Date of Birth: Whatever their birthday is, year :2009, on more than one form

Questions weve gotten:
"I dont have a real Social Security number yet, can I use my fake one?"
"Ive been walking up and down the block and cant find the store. Does it say Rickys?"
"Do you have cameras like allll over the store?"
"My probation officer has to call you, is that okay?"


Again, I can not make these things up and while I do get annoyed at all the dumbness and have lost faith in the NYC public school system, it gives me quite the amount of entertainment throughout the day. Party Time.