About two weeks ago I was invited to attend a friend's bday at Mr. West. I was hesitant on going seeing as how I had previously been to this club and the Doorman pulled me aside and told me a friend of a friend was not allowed in because she was on the heavy side. True story. ( Try being me and having to come up with an excuse in a matter of 10 seconds on why we really couldn't stay. Fun times.) Buuut it was for my Debster so I most certainly had to make an appearance. ( An appearance that lasted till about 3 am. I never stick to my "I'm not staying out too late" rule.)
I get to the door and see others w Deb's party standing in front of the Doorman totally looking like Tyson Beckford on crack with a furry hat and super 'mo ("'mo" is Melissa language for "homo")plaid jacket. There is no one online but these 5 people. No one. But. FIVE. people. These five people were left standing outside for about 20 minutes while the Doorman just stood there staring at them w his stupid furry hat and 'mo jacket probably thinking "hey look at me I can make these people stand outside all night long".
The point of all this rambling is that I really would like to come back as a Doorman in my next life. You're basically a super herb who has been given the chance to wear a trendy outfit stand at the door of a nightclub w some little walkie-talkie going in and out of the club trying to make it seem like youre actually doing something important all while having people kiss your ass all night and you know very well you arent letting half of them in but they will stand there all night trying. Its fun to watch people sweat.
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