Holy Mason Betha

I used to LOVE Mase. Like LOVE. Something about that slow ryhming just did it for me. I was looking through my old single tapes ( the ones you used to buy in Sam Goody for like 2.99 that had the song with words on one side and the instrumental on the other. Why idk.) and found this one. I played this tape so much the writing is no longer visible and the film is about worn out. You loved it too. Dont. Front.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2e6SgrJCjSw

The Doorman

About two weeks ago I was invited to attend a friend's bday at Mr. West. I was hesitant on going seeing as how I had previously been to this club and the Doorman pulled me aside and told me a friend of a friend was not allowed in because she was on the heavy side. True story. ( Try being me and having to come up with an excuse in a matter of 10 seconds on why we really couldn't stay. Fun times.) Buuut it was for my Debster so I most certainly had to make an appearance. ( An appearance that lasted till about 3 am. I never stick to my "I'm not staying out too late" rule.)

I get to the door and see others w Deb's party standing in front of the Doorman totally looking like Tyson Beckford on crack with a furry hat and super 'mo ("'mo" is Melissa language for "homo")plaid jacket. There is no one online but these 5 people. No one. But. FIVE. people. These five people were left standing outside for about 20 minutes while the Doorman just stood there staring at them w his stupid furry hat and 'mo jacket probably thinking "hey look at me I can make these people stand outside all night long".

The point of all this rambling is that I really would like to come back as a Doorman in my next life. You're basically a super herb who has been given the chance to wear a trendy outfit stand at the door of a nightclub w some little walkie-talkie going in and out of the club trying to make it seem like youre actually doing something important all while having people kiss your ass all night and you know very well you arent letting half of them in but they will stand there all night trying. Its fun to watch people sweat.

Melissa's Pros and Con's on having dudes as friends

Ive always had alot of guy friends and acquaintances. Im very good at being the "one of the guys" girl which has its pros and cons. Some ppl dont believe that guys and girls can be just friends. This can be true if youve had some sort of history in the relationship department, but for the most part I think its retarded to think that way. Here are my pros and cons on having a "hes really just my friend" friend:

Pros:

1) They give you advice from a dude's perspective when it comes to relations w the opposite sex (ie stop wasting your time or just ask him whats up and see what hppns) Good advice. Even if you dont follow it. At least they told you so.

2) You can use them as a "oh my bfs over there" excuse when out at a club and some creepy freak wont leave you alone

3)They are, for the most part, drama free.

4) Youll always have a dancing partner when out at a club in Harlem and that merengue song comes on.

5) Theyll tell you what your wearing is absolutely retarded and you wont get offended by it.

Cons:

1)They give you advice from a dude's perspective when it comes to relations w the opposite sex (ie stop wasting your time or just ask him whats up and see what hppns) Sometimes this is stuff you really dont want to hear especially bc they are guys and really who are we kidding most of you think alike.

2)COCKBLOCK-works both ways

Thats really all the cons I can think about. I would complain that some of them act like they are 5 yrs old again when in a big group, but who are we fooling I get like that too.

I will marry anyone who can serenade me like this

Okay, maybe not anyone.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sPnwHnBFjg4

At at at Night

This is ma soooooooooooooooowng...at the moment. Love the song, love the video, love Mr. Solo do low


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVb_t_ao9gw

Tattoos

I love tattoos. I have one, will be getting a second one soon and who knows after that. Like the Pringles commercial, once you pop ya just can't stop. I would love to get one on my wrist or shoulder but don't know how good that would look at an office or when in my bridesmaid dress next year or when I'm an 80 yr old woman.

I think they look cool on girls, obviously on guys and think everyone should get one. Unless you're gonna get something really wack like a flower. Yes, that's wack.

My Obsessions

I have a lot of things that I can't stop doing, live without and just really love because they put a smile on my face. Including, but not limited to:

Nicknaming-I have a habit of nicknaming people. Especially guys. Whether they be guys in my life or a friend's, you're gonna get a nickname. Ie Texter, Hummer Boy, Miami, Okcups, Bootleg Kobe..some of the favorites. Its fun. Try it sometime.

Song assignment-I love music. Period. There is a song out there that reminds me of everyone I know, I have ever known, an event, or place. Some, when I hear them, make me feel all warm and toasty inside ( "Run It"-Miami LDW Prive 2005 ah I wanna go back). Some make me want to stab myself , or others, in the eye. It happens. Memories, memories.

Two words-Lil' Wayne- I've been obsessed with Lil' Wayne ever since I heard that raspy voice on "Back that Ass Up"(now now after you back it up than stop..drr drr drop it like its hot..yep thats him) I have all his albums, will watch anything on tv with him on it, will dl any song that hes making a cameo in, which is practically every song out right now, and paid $110 to go see him in concert ( well worth the $). I. heart. Weezyy baybeeh.

My Blackberry-no explanation needed.

Miami-I love Miami. I love the beaches, I love the people, I love the food, I love love Miami. I had grand aspirations of moving down there recently but it just was not in the cards for me. I would like to move down there one day no matter if its in my 30's, 40's or when im a little old lady with my beach hat and sunblock in hand eyeing the strapping young lads in their board shorts.

Facebook- If it wasn't for this site I wouldn't have found my old school homies from my beloved HS days and really wouldn't keep in touch with as many people that I do. FB is a nosey, instigating son-of-B sometimes, but gotta love it.

Secretely being a worrier-Well, not so secret anymore. I'm like a vault sometimes. Up until recently, I've never been one to discuss how I'm feeling, what's going on with me , etc. I just am not one to share news.It's not you. It's me. Alot of you think I'm Miss Calm Cool Collected Melissa just does not care (unless you are one of the very few that I bitch to. lucky you). While I try to be that way at all times, I do worry alot. I worry if I will ever find the right job, if I will ever move out of my house, if I will be the last one standing one day when all my friends are getting married and will T.I really go to jail for 30 years..aaahhh the suspense..kidding about the last one. Kind of. See kids, I have feelings too.

Humor-I think that I am a pretty funny girl. You know it. I love to make people laugh, even if they are laughing at me. You're still laughing. I also love to laugh. Alot of you know I laugh at mostly everything. It really does not take much to send me into tearing, snorting laughing. If youve heard the snort, then it mustve been REALLY funny.