Last Friday was my not so little brother's bday and seeing as he would rather be seen wearing an Ed Hardy shirt than step foot into a club we decided to kick it old school and throw him a little house party. Don't fret my pets, just because I didn't go out doesn't mean no Friday "Only Melissa" mishaps occured. While nothing proved to be extremely epic, good times were had by all. Anywho, here goes.
The Quesadillas:
For some reason, Quesadillas make people happy and for some reason everyone was shocked that I was making them. When I pulled that pan and Pam out people acted as if I had just told them I thought guidos were hot. Contrary to popular belief, I can cook people. Jeez. Plus, putting a tortilla on a pan and melting cheese on top of it really doesnt require Rachel Ray skills. Not gonna lie, they were mighty good. Moral of this story: dont judge a book by its cover. Just because I flinch whenever I chip a nail doesnt mean I dont know how to use a stove. And yes I do remember to turn it off afterwards. Hardy har har.
The P-tron:
Oh the P liquid. This is a magic liquid that causes people to speak truths they would never speak, stumble,fumble,ramble and a bunch of other -bles as well as give super human strengths to the weakest of the bunch (more on that in a few). Whoever invented this needs to go straight to hell.(See ya down there and save me a shot) Moral of this story: be careful where and who you drink this around kids. Preferrably do it around me so that I can be provided with entertaiment.
"You have this on your Ipod?"
Let's just cut to the chase. While my number one loves are hip-hop and faux-hop ( ie ring tone rap and gravy doused jams), I do have other things on my Ipod besides these. The people in attendance all know me pretty much since the pre-contacts days and still seem to be shocked at the things that come out of that magical little contraption. Guess I am one big fooler. Moral of the story: Boy George rules. That's all.
Last but not least:
The Refrigerator
While this moment didnt seem like a big deal to me, it proved quite epic for those who witnessed it. One eye-witness stated " I walked into the kitchen and everyone looked as if they had just seem some paranormal ish". Another: " I was in awe as how someone so little could move something so big". Basically, I dropped my phone (what else is new), parts went flying everywhere and my vodka goggles convinced me that I had seen the battery fall under the refrigerator. I first attempted to move the fridge myself and those who know me, know that I have zero upper arm strength (let's just hope I never have to hang onto something for dear life) so I failed. I then looked over at an anonymous young lad (who later was discovered to be a friend of my brother's) to help me move it. Kid acted as if I had just asked him to help me rob the local bodega. Since anonymous chicken boy did not want to help me, and I wanted my battery something sort of force came over me and bam went the fridge a few feet from the wall. Determination kids. That's all it takes.Turns out my battery was not under the fridge and one of my trusted pals had it in his hand the whole time and I guess just wanted to see what lengths I would go to save my phone. Moral of the story: In the words of a wise young poet: "If I want it imma get that should not be tooken light..." well, when it comes to my phone at least. Ah so sad.
Many of these moments were definitely "you had to be there" moments and if you were there ya know. Magic always happens in Club Ferman. Our doors shall re-open come summer. Thank you.
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